What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize