I wish my penis had an off switch
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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