jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
