Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
