I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
