Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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