So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
