walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
