She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
