your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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