He kissed a someone with a penis
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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