I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
