Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
