He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
