i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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