Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize