Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I feel like death gave me a hand job
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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