Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize