we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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