Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
