Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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