I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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