Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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