having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize