these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
