I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
