I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Pants are for mortals
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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