no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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