I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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