i just google imaged poop.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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