i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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