I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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