Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
