It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
