Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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