i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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