its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
