So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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