I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
