I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
