why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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