WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
