This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Randomize
