I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
