So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
