In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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