Dual....:-)
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
