Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
