Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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