I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Houston, we have a squirter
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
