I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
