I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
